Saturday, April 2, 2011


there's a balance between stability and change. One day at a time.

draft 1

the brainstorming and sowing the seeds. I have lots of good ideas. I have to believe in my ability to turn them into realities.

and the sowing of the garden is the editing, paying attention to details and placing value on my work.

2 distinct steps of a process. like the spiritual path, one must take the medicine given by the shaykh. One step towards Allah and He takes 10 steps towards you. Maybe, I am just overwhelmed by what that closeness will mean. closer than my jugular vein, in Allah's hand. it is more than ideas, thoughts what good is it if i simply write things down and don't read them. Allah created the intellect first and now I know why. It is because the Pen would write in the Lahw Mahfooz which is the soul, in order to be known, and read, because that is the first word revealed.

Words spoken, written, must be discovered, understood, returned to, explored gain and improve them, what value do they have? connect them, publish/share them...and above all, act on them, change my behavior, change my thought processes and my actions, towards what I know is best. If I don't learn from my mistakes I will keep making them. it's like nurturing a garden, aka jannah, if my niyyah is for Allah. I am molding clay, painting a portrait, i just have to really focus on that and remember it. Perhaps I am overly emphasizing on the abstract and not enough of the concrete.

distractions are from shaytan we give the most to what has the most value, and that makes us the ahlul akhirah. That is really what I want to be. Interesting, that my father has taken that step so early in my life, and that has influenced how I live my life here and my attitude toward the hereafter. Yet, again, what about the DEEDS? perhaps it is a combination of not having or knowing stability, and not having enough faith in myself, that prevents me from striving for success. However, that is just an excuse and I know much more stability than many people. I am a feather that has softly landed.

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