traveling treasures

We each have an inner spark and are made of one light. As it travels and we travel with it, we are changed by it. we can choose the change. some do not even see it because it pervades them.. We had christmas dinner at rosemary's with Matt, Uncle Joe, and Grandpa. Rosemary is such a good cook. show your love with your deeds and feed your family and that changes the world. controling yourself despite the situation you can not. give it to Allah. it was 2 years ago we lived there.Taz and Terra are both gone now. We found out Grandpa got depressed and has gout and stopped eating and the neighbors called the fire department to check on him and he was fine after he ate. Christmas Eve we drove down to Anderson and spent the night at matt's. Tim and Sylvia, and Mike and  Lynn  came. Christmas morning we drove back to nc and I got sick. I felt okay later and ate with dr vines and opal.
I connect and create with my own mind body and soul to people insha'Allah. it is Allah's Attributes and Actions, in orbit, ascending in bloom to be known. 2013 is the year of the serpent, apply what you know. the full moon in cancer tonight, open mic, help from ancestors  to heal and let go. When you watch a film it can change you, yet it remains apart from you.every time there is another layer to peel.  observe the creation drama, respond only with love.    you build it and it grows and you let it go..  Marc said the ghost of his grandma helped him get his guitar ready on stage.

winter solstice spring euinox

No more hiding. Break out in celebration, it's the galaxy's birthday. darkness recedes now. spiritual midwifery. red tent, crecent crab moon sea pearl. cultivating my own energy for this time means being more quiet and waiting for answers to come rather than seek them. there is a fire that burns though flame touched it not. the change comes when you master your gift self and embrace the shadow, that the world has molded you into, but is not true. You see the fire in you and do not seek it with the eyes. open to the unity of all things to give and receive. the new earth grows seed and kernel with your light. you see the unseen before it appears, at the source.
Allah reveals Himself when one surrenders their senses, Al mu’alim. Allah is in you, in creation, go in, thru and beyond. Layla is on the raido~Lailat Al Qadr. I  heard nadia’s cd player and it was sami yusuf try not to cry little one,. I imagined it as a message to her as a child who really did feel all alone, and then I was thinking of islam and muslims, as well as other religions with other followers, and how Allah reveals Himself thru them all,Allah made man into nations and tribes to teach them and show them the beauty of diversity and of His Creative Power, and that each separate religion ensured that they would all be guided, in one way or another, thru one message, one teacher, one book, or another, different because each human is different, yet all similar bc we are one soul, and seeing the jamal and jalal as a sign again from Allah from nation to nation that they each are both blessed and tried. 

phoenix

 I am going to be happy and feel good and put that first. If you can't meet me I won't go.Questions demanding answers have no space. I can not bend and break to fit. My darkest days have come, and I hope I can put myself together with Marc, without medication but it may come to that. Seeds sprout in the dark. Stars shine in the dark. Dark is calm and quiet, in the cave. The spiral is upwards. Number 9. Nadia's birthday party at Granny's had ernie, dianne, nina, mom, rob, granny, me and marc. she got a cool clock and a cute horse and we had cake and ice cream. Monday Marc called in and we drove down Brickyard to Tall Trees. Granny Nina and Ernie were there, we ate and got water.

I wanted to get out of Cali, so I can make the most out of being home again. But I have not made this my home yet.  I have been with Marc for 4 years, married half a year. Moving isn't always the answer, but I liked Hendersonville better and finally it is on the table. Lenon said his children orbit around him. I have never felt rooted or at home and just came into my body. it is going to be a one day at a time thing, to get body mind soul food shelter clothing family friends in order.

observe

I enter the cave of myself.I choose how to respond. This is the point of no return. I am light and dark as Allah lowers and lifts my heart's veil to be known. We were created to know. Musa was busy asking questions rather than experiencing directly. All you hear is an echo. I know there is no where to run on a spiral. My mind is hiding behind my heart crying wolf. If you don't learn you will always return. As above so below. Everything is measured divinely. When I make a space peace falls into place. there is no eject button, so plug into the source. Peace descends instantly and the boat can not be rocked.
It's all me creating destiny. The Great Work. The pieces do fit, there is no lack. Cinnamon took me to Cheshire, Danielle taught. I  feel glad to have the support in myself and the universe if i ask.  Christina and I observed Hot Vital Flow w/ Martia, She was dropping hints about bones and body. It was great to watch her, feel the heat, see the students at different levels.  Marc laid out super sick today and Nadia had a half day..
Nadia was sent home with a fever, and I decided the yoga was a struggle I could accept putting aside. I have to enjoy the ride and not grab on just to feel alive. I lose power when I put the demand or expectation on what is beyond my control.

thanks giving pearl

Unity sees itself. Just to see the pearl is enough even if you can't take it with you. It is buried deep in the sea, in a shell. the only way this song could be sung is if every note was played. it doesn't make sense when you read the music, only when you hear the song. it is the composer listening that adds the subtle AUM. to be enveloped fully in life you have to be willing to set it free at any time. potential and possibility and destiny lie there. beyond your understanding and only to be lived.  It takes many rubs of the waves to form the pearl. it is old patient and wise
which blessings of the Lord will you deny? i see the result of going half way, and listening to a noise outside just because it is sudden doesn't mean i should go check it out. Allah says am I not your Lord? Tree of Life or Knowledge? I can not read! I can not measure. I can not divide. Mind or Heart?
wed. nadia spent the night with  friend and came back at the last minute . rob was at the store when we got to their house.  mom showed nadia how to blend pastels better and she gave me seeds to sprout. marc and rob played some guitar together. mom said granny always makes thing beautiful now. and that i don't share my gifts enough. she cried when we left.

every body has a changeable story

 Everything starts at the head, the cerebrum, the Ram. Ra the Light. Right ascension Meridian. Raise the oil.Passive vs Active. alchemical wedding.Agreement to create. thoughts voice essence source. we all have tools to do life's work. the work is a balanced body mind soul..our body  is like a pole magnetically tied to earth and  stars. It remembers reacts responds to all of life's events.the body is the container of the spirit. it is a box to manifest experience.

The brain is elastic and plastic.most people go on auto pilot and some awaken kundalini. Reading is really listening to someone and not saying a word as well as looking into each other's eyes teaches us about our illusion of ourselves and how to offer a safe space for others to heal. telling my body's story was a burying of sorts. thoughts and feelings are in us, we must transform our vision to witness. I am making my story beautiful.

amelia

Standing, sitting, or reclining, shine as an orb. No fear or grief, speak only good. in beauty and love. sing and dance and hug trees, Read with Allah, be alone to know, is to take the bitter fruit. let it go to Allah. Create, turn on, raise oil,  make it beautiful as before again. .the knower, knowledge and known are one. i got caught up in the whirl wind of the angel's caress. not wanting to be here in a cage, looking away, turning away, to face a lesser test. I saw it's shadow, the dunya,  for what it was so want more to let go of it. i must be in myself to birth it and unite people outside. see all around the cycle never stops of love. build make nurture create, like the red moon, most good for most people in my caravan. .Return like monarch migrations  first in flight. for a blink of eternity. so what if i see destruction? Look what I made of the pieces! that is why i don't sit for long, let go and look back down the river. i make that destruction like shakti. when things burn down we miss  the illusion for a minute. I am that minute. then hold on tight to what comes together to see yourself in love.